Positive Discipline – Parenting Matters

Why children struggle to cooperate

Some common complaints we hear from parents are: It’s frustrating that my 3 year old refuses to write; my 8 year old son gives me a hard time when I try to wake him up in the morning; It’s so irritating when my teenage daughter does not finish her school assignments on time. We believe...

Engage your child’s cooperation by writing a note

“Listen instead of lecture. Communicate instead of command. Relate instead of retaliate. Be flexible instead of being fixated on getting your own way. Seek to be part of the solution instead of part of the problem. In short, behave the way you want your children to learn to behave.” – L.R. Knost, author of the...

Engaging your child’s Cooperation by expressing your feelings

Can I ask you a question? As parents do we express our feelings to our children? Do we make ourselves vulnerable to them? Most of us do not. We believe that as adults, we shouldn’t burden our children with our emotions; rather we need to deal with it ourselves. We feel it’s necessary to show...

Made a mistake? We all do. Let’s set it right !

We have all heard the adage, ‘Mistakes are stepping stones to success.’ Is it really true? Let’s find out. Try to picture these scenes. Amit, 3 years old, picks up a glass of water and brings it slowly to his mouth. Suddenly, it slips from his fingers. The water spills all over. The parent says,...

Spare the rod and Connect with the child

Spare the rod and spoil the child. Such an age old saying, and generations of children have been brought up in this way for the fear they might otherwise turn out spoilt. We parents often resort to punishments as we want our children to develop a sense of discipline. The ‘rod’ symbolizes punishment of various...

Engage your child’s cooperation by giving information

As parents we would like our children to behave well, to learn the right values and to do things that are acceptable. For our home to run like a well-oiled machine, we would want the chores to be completed within a given time frame. And for this to happen, we would surely want cooperation from...

Engage your child’s cooperation by giving choices

Imagine there is a person of authority who orders you around – “Finish this work right now!”, “You must get the house in order”, “You better come back early!”. You are not given any choices. Your feelings or needs are not important. You just must obey. How would you feel? You may feel defensive, resentful...

Using humour in parenting

When the alarm shrills every morning our first thoughts are often the ‘to-do list’. With many tasks to strike off the page as the day wears on, how do we interact with our children in the busyness of the day? Are we brusque and snappy or do we manage to connect with our children with...

Child leash – helpful or harmful?

During my recent travel abroad, I was astounded to see some parents taking their toddlers out on leashes! Leashes came in different varieties – some had a fur cuff placed on wrists of both the parent and child, while some others came as animal backpacks with a long tail serving as the leash. Generally, parents...

Rewards: How effective are they in disciplining children?

Besides Punishment, another commonly used method to discipline children is through rewards. Parents often resort to rewarding children in the hope of motivating or changingtheir behaviour. Rewards include bribes, giving stars or stickers for good behaviour,conditional gifts and even praise. Believe it or not praise is a verbal reward! At times, we makestatements such as:...

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